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Reflection from February 6th, 2014 @ Age 32

RE:  NOT HAVING MY “LIFE FIGURED OUT” BY MY SELF-IMPOSED DEADLINE OF AGE 33 i.e. TOMORROW :0/

I saw John Salinger yesterday at the Statehouse and it was…uhh…neutral (?), I guess…(?).  I don’t know—he was with Melissa and they were heading to the S.B.43 meeting, from which I was leaving; but at which I’d made a big fuss about speaking (hah! ;0) so I took the opportunity to explain and it was good, or, I mean okay I guess…they just seemed so separate.  So separate from me I guess, and they offered help with reviewing my AG proposal and were impressed with my ideas in working with Senator Coley and very nice and cordial and all…so, I’m not sure what it was—why they felt so very separate from me.  It felt at once good and bad.  I mean, great really—because when I walk around the Statehouse now, people know me and say “hi” and like to get to see me there and I hold my head high and feel confident with purpose and conviction and genuine self-love and acceptance of myself for exactly who I am, and all that I represent.  And that, for that—I have been dreaming in color by day and by night for what seems nearly an eternity now.  It feels like a dream come true—but not like any of the ones before which turned out to be nightmares.  It feels genuine and hard-earned and legit; it feels like an honor to be menow…it feels like an honor.  And there’s just nothing quite like it, that I’ve ever felt before in my life.  It’s phenomenal..

~