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Reflection from September 30th, 2011 @ Age 30

RE:  LEARNING TO MAKE GOOD USE OF THE BIPOLAR CYCLES.

Hello.  Not a whole lot of inspiration going on here at the moment.  There’s some, it comes in spits of excitement and hope, but mostly I’m just even keeled right now—taking the medications like I’m supposed to.  I will say, it’s kind of a relief at times, to be stable.  Mentally, that is (but in most other respects as well, I would say).  But sometimes I miss the highs and lows as well.  It’s almost like I need to set my life up so that I can have periods to lower the meds and be more creative and inspired; and then periods when I’m on the full doses, such that I can get my work done that requires a bit more level kind of head.  It’s kind of brilliant in a way, to be able to control it—depending upon where I am at in life, and what I am trying to get done.  But I’m still not quite there yet, in terms of being in a place where I can maximize both sets of skill.  I am working toward it though, every day now I am.